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The places that scare you

If you find yourself running away or avoiding certain experiences, places, things or people it might be insightful to ask yourself ‘Why?’ Beyond that see if you can find the courage to face up to whatever it is you are avoiding.

Sometimes it is necessary for our growth to deal with situations which generate strong negative emotions for us. It is natural to want only happy experiences but life is a mixed bag and our long term growth and happiness require us to ‘square up’ to the unpleasant. It is good for us to get to a place where we can take the rough with the smooth. If we do not face up to the ‘rough’ it holds us back and life has a way of sending us more of the same until we change our approach. Avoiding what scares us leaves it on our emotional ‘to do’ list and unfinished business limits our sense of freedom to move forward.

When we find the inner resources to face up to what scares us a number of positive spin offs arise :

– The situation is rarely as difficult as we thought in advance as our worst fears are rarely realised
– Our coping skills for future similar experiences are better
– When we learn to deal with something, we tend to attract less of the same going forward
– Our self confidence is enhanced
– Our horizons are expanded, and more seems possible
– We are less fearful going forward
– We become more comfortable with the unknown as our belief to deal with whatever life sends us is strengthened
– We will tend to look for and find opportunities in all situations

None of the above is meant to encourage anyone to be reckless or to take on unnecessary risks, but we owe it to ourselves and our long term happiness to deal with all aspects of reality as we find it. Of course, we need to choose the best time to act, but if we are deferring action for another day be sure that you are doing this for the best of intentions.

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