If our formative years are filled with criticism, parental or otherwise, it can have a devastating affect on our adult lives. For some the signs will be obvious e.g. lack of confidence or under achievement. While others will seek to mask feelings of low self esteem through over achievement. What is important is awareness, as this ‘outing’ of what happened is an essential first step in addressing the issue.
Do any of the following apply to you ?
– big need for external approval
– tendency to take criticism personally
– give up easily or not try at all
– believe that you are ‘ not good enough ‘ or deserving
– regularly feel victimized
– avoid situations where you might be criticized
– appease others to avoid conflict/criticism
– feelings of depression, anxiety and addiction can be pointers to childhood criticism
– never satisfied with accomplishments
– difficulty in accepting compliments
– tendency to over achievement/workaholic
– hear criticism where there is none
– resist/avoid feedback on performance
– engage in self sabotaging behavior
– dread of ‘performance situations’
An honest acknowledgement of the influence of childhood criticism on our beliefs about ourselves positions us to begin the process of rebuilding our self esteem.