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Personal Coaching

Honesty

We have all heard that 'honesty is the best policy' and would probably regard ourselves as basically honest and trustworthy. But how true is this ? Test yourself against the following  : -   Do you ever tell 'white' lies  eg to avoid embarassment or conflict ? -   Do you exagerate for effect ? -   Do you supress or 'forget to mention '…
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YOUR best is good enough

'Good enough isn't' but your best is good enough.  How can we do better than our best ? Yet how often do we beat ourselves up for our performances, even if they are our best.  The problem lies in our definition of 'best'. The true definition is the 'best' we can be today with the skills, experience and level of…
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Dealing with disappointment

Truly 'enlightened beings' will never suffer from disappointment, because they live in a state of acceptance of  'what is'  and without hopes/expectations for the future. While this is a worthy aspiration the chances are you have not yet got there ! It is part of the human condition to feel pain from failures, defeats, etc so it serves us well to…
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No feeling is final

Why do we sometimes take feelings so seriously, when experience tells us that they will not last ? It's because we allow ourselves to BECOME the feeling, thereby forgetting that 'no feeling is final' Even if we choose to wallow in a feeling it will move on eventually. Like a passing cloud in the sky it is not permanent and will be replaced…
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Writing to calm the mind

Increasingly those involved in the healing professions are recommending writing as a practise to deal with inner turmoil, restore a sense of perspective and unearth the insights needed for personal growth. Writing could be considered the Western form of meditation. Sitting still for 'long' periods and 'doing nothing', as many in our culture would view meditative practices, might be ok in India…
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Know when you are at a crossroads

During the course of a lifetime we are faced with a number of crossroad decisions. These are different from normal day to day decisions in that they are few in number but profound in terms of their impact on our future. Examples might include : -choice of career -change of career -starting a business -decision to live abroad -choice of…
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Fear

Fear lurks beneath all our negative emotions. An awareness of it is an essential first step to 'squaring up' to and processing the relevant emotion and returning us to a happier place.  Of course, a certain amount of fear is necessary for survival eg the fear that causes us to run when confronted by danger. However, in the main fear is not something that we want to…
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The power of Apology

You are in conflict with someone and emotions are running high. Both of you are convined that you are in the right. This can lead to a breakdown in communication (needed to resolve all conflicts ), escalation of the issue and possibly a painful stand off that can permanently damage relationships (typical of family disputes). Sometimes we forget that a genuine apology is…
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So someone pressed your buttons….

You have  just had a strong negative reaction to something someone  has said or 'done' to you. You may have looked  at the situation 'logically' but can't figure out why your reaction is so strong. It plays on your mind and maybe you have difficulty sleeping. Any of this sound familiar? Typical choices we make in these situations  are : 1.…
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Knowing when to ask for help

We all know the male stereotype who never asks for directions no matter how lost he is, and we can all be a bit like that sometimes. At the other end of the spectrum is the 'victim' who has mastered the art of helplessness (sometimes unconsciously) in order to extract sympathy and support from others. So it is question of getting…
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